Reflections from March 26, 2022 – Day 15 of my journey.
Realizing your why can be one of the most powerful and transformational moments in a person’s life.
But that clarity doesn’t always come right away.
Sometimes, it takes time. It takes sitting in the stillness. It takes walking through the hardest days you’ll ever face before you begin to understand how your why speaks to you.
For me, it took nearly three months to realize that my son, Maxwell Seraphim, is my why.
Looking back now, years later, I can see it clearly—but in that moment, I had no idea the kind of journey my why would take me on.
The Fire Ignited by a Name
In those early days after losing Max, I was broken, lost, and unsure if I’d ever find my footing again.
But somewhere in the stillness—between the pain and the deep sadness—I began to understand that I had a reason to keep going.
And that understanding started with his name.
After we learned we had lost our son, my wife and I found ourselves having one of the hardest conversations imaginable: what to name the baby we would never get to raise.
We had already agreed on a first name—Maxwell—but now we had to choose a middle name, something meaningful. I remember scrolling through lists of Hebrew baby boy names when I came across one that stopped me in my tracks: Seraphim.
At first, I saw that it meant “fiery,” and it felt right. I had the chance to feel Max kick once while he was still in my wife’s belly—and in that brief, beautiful moment, there was life and energy. Fire.
But later I discovered something deeper.
Seraphim didn’t just mean fiery.
It meant fiery angel.
And that changed everything.
Looking back now, that name couldn’t be more fitting.
Because Max—my fiery angel—is both my fire and my why.
That’s the moment the spark was lit.
And it’s the fire that continues to guide me every single day.
The 1% Better Mindset: More Than a Mantra
That’s when I began to live by a simple but powerful mindset:
1% better every day.
Not perfection.
Not massive leaps.
Just steady, intentional growth—each day, in some way, getting better than I was the day before.
I told myself:
If Max is looking down on me from Heaven, I want him to see a father who is giving his best—every single day.
I want him to be proud.
What started as a mindset became something far more powerful: a purpose-driven lifestyle.
When Purpose Replaces Negotiation
Once your why becomes your purpose, something shifts.
You stop negotiating with yourself.
You stop asking, “Do I feel like it today?”
You stop justifying why you should take it easy or skip a step.
Because your journey is no longer optional.
It’s a commitment.
A calling.
A part of who you are.
It doesn’t matter what life throws at you—sleepless nights, sickness, setbacks, or chaos.
You press forward.
Because you know why you’re doing it.
And that why carries you through the hardest of days.
Over 1,100 Days Later
Today, after 1,100+ consecutive days of showing up—through grief, illness, the exhaustion of parenting, and all the ups and downs of life—I can say this with confidence:
1% better every day isn’t a slogan. It’s a lifestyle.
It’s a daily act of remembrance.
A daily act of resilience.
A daily way to honor the child I lost, and the man I strive to become because of him.
From Loss to Legacy 
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